The Snow Day

We had a few really nice sunny days here, very spring-like and I was already really hopeful for the snow to melt way before I have to go home. But now it's been drizzling again and there's much more snow. I'm still hopeful it's just that spring snow that means the old one is going to melt. In Finland we have this saying that roughly translates as "new snow is the death of old snow." Sounds much more poetic in Finnish. 

I hate the expression "being outside your comfort zone" (espeically in Finnish because it's not a Finnish thing to say or do and it doesn't sit in the Finnish language) but I'm definitely outside my comfort zone now here. Like in the yoga class, it was a totally new way of doing it, but I'm sure it does me good and I should keep going there (it was a bit expensive because there's no point in me buying a membership but let's see how that goes). Somehow Nuuk has been a surprise* and living truly alone now, that's also really outside my comfort zone. The house still keeps scaring me a bit and just being all alone, it's not easy. I've always been prone to anxiousness and being alone has been one of my biggest triggers. In recent years I've grown to like being home alone sometimes, but in a new, strange place, it's been hard. I've had to look some very dark thing inside myself straight in the eye. Still don't know what I've seen or where I'm going with that, but like that song in Kimmy Schmidt said: sometimes the only way to go is to just go on.

Next I think I'll try a massage here. I love massages.

Also, trying to stay healthy by taking all my vitamins but it's not super easy. I've always been a bit anemic and I should take iron supplements but those bastards taste bad! It might help with being tired but the taste is just ugly! Ew! I promise I'll try. But it's bad and I don't wanna!

I've met some more dogs. They are just so well trained! I was taking a walk at the Qinngorput area, trekking on the snow along the hillside. I saw tracks of a human and a dog and thought I'd follow them, even if there was a bit of a snowstorm happening. So I keep walking and at some point I realize I'm walking along a very sharply slanted, rocky hill, on slippery snow and if I slip, I'll fall right into the freezing ocean and nobody'll ever know. But then I tried not to think about it and just kept walking. Found my way back on the road eventually and was rewarded by a really happy doggy running around. I tried to call it but it just jumped around, playing in the snow. It was clearly interested in saying hello but again, so well trained it did not come near enough for even a quick pet. The owner was further away and kept calling it and eventually it went to him. I'm impressed by the dogs' good behavior but I wouldn't mind if some of them came to be petted.

I feel the snow has different kind of shadows here than in Finland. The shadows are blue, almost turquoise. I don't know how to explain that and I don't think it would translate into a photo. Back home the shadows are grey. But here, they sometimes seem as if they're glowing in color.  

*I've been a bit complain-y and I just want to clear up that everybody here have been very nice to me** and if I've had a difficult time, it's just about me. I think the town being quite similar to where I live has been something that's made this tough; it feels like I moved to another apartment in Oulu and all my friends deserted me. I also have some issues with being alone that are rough, even if it's probably also good that I try to face them head on now that I have the chance. Good, but not easy. I'm really happy and in awe that I got to come here and it's seriously incredibly important to me that my art and project were thought of as good enough to get me this residency.

** Expect for that one guy who spat on me. It was the second or third day I got here, I was just walking around and saw a guy about to pass me by. He was walking towards me and then when he passed me, he just spat on me. It was... unpleasant. But there it is.